It’s funny. You watch never been kisses and it makes no sense. How could someone with value never receive such an obvious form of affection till such a late age. But at 26 I’ve never been loved. It’s never been said to me. I’ve been wanted before. Needed before. Desired before. But never loved before. I’ve been abused before. Neglected before. Abandoned before. But never loved before. I’ve been thanked before. I’ve been awarded before. I’ve been appreciated before. But never loved before.

You see I’m not moving on because the cliff is so steep. That doesn’t mean that I’m not on a presipus.

Might be time to give up.

Might be time to jump.

Walking

Away
What’s the point
Near
How’s it different

Once
I was different
Tonight
I fail on all accounts
Saviors
Not found in this time

So despair

rot

eat through the outside

my edges bite against you

trying to make the pressure stop

like a porcupine i stick to deep

i make your edges hurt

i make your edges bleed

I used to fix the width between us so you wouldn’t hurt

but then i never felt

so i lessened the gap

i did it so i would feel

and ive started to feel your blood seep down my skin

what once was ivory now drips with crimson

i feel at the sake of you

i need 

so i rip the price off the stock

the tomato is still green

but i demand red dripping down

so i pluck too early and 

i make you 

i make

and you bleed

Now

Fall from graces
To depths unknown
I see what hardens
To make my bones
There’s worms in hearts
Decay in souls

You pretended

I live in pits
I die in vain
Yesterday was faked
Tomorrow is pain
My pity takes shape
And curves away

You changed

Blind but not dumb
I speak in riddle
You make be doubt
I appear so little
As I curse my heart
Hope it withers

You leave